Sometimes it can feel like I’m writing from the inside of an echo chamber. Like my words are just bouncing back at me from the void. Or that they immediately fall flat, going nowhere.
I have yet to be able to truly market my writing. I post to all my social media but the main feedback I get is from friends or family. That’s great, in that it’s honest and supportive and always comes from a place of love. But I worry sometimes that the positive environment might actually be doing more harm than good.
My goal is and has always been to improve. I want to become not only a better writer, but a better advocate for myself and the disability community at large. There are times when I feel like I’m not doing enough or doing the right things to make that happen.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful for the support I get and from the small but dedicated following I have. I just want to do right by them and myself. I want to make sure that I’m putting out the best content I’m capable of and growing as much as I can while doing so.
The problem being I’m not always sure how to go about that. Am I doing enough in this moment and just need to be patient? Or are there changes I could make for the better?
I don’t have the answers to those questions. But maybe my discomfort is an answer in and of itself. Maybe by constantly consistently being mindful of the decisions I’m making, I’m inadvertently setting myself on the right course. I honestly don’t know. I know what I hope though. And I know that I’m going to keep working at my goals. That will just have to be good enough for now.